The Things I Know

One quote from a Conference address challenges us all to focus on the things that we DO know, as opposed to those we don't know now.  I've actually made lists of all the things I do know and I thought a good exercise would be for me to share these for my small plates (things sacred to me.) 

To begin with- I know how to forgive.  It's something I've worked on and prayed over and over about and learned about and practiced.  It is hard to describe to another that hasn't had this experience but it is so liberating and refreshing.  It is a power that is harnessed.  Like everyone, I have had my fair share of life's disappointments and betrayals- by family members, by friends and even abuse.  But I'm so thankful that when I read in the Beatitudes- you will be forgiven as you forgive others- is exactly what it means!   Forgiving doesn't necessarily mean forgetting but it becomes remembering with a compassionate heart rather than hate.  I know this.  Forgiveness is possible.  Forgiveness is a gift.

Much of  this Sunday's sacrament meeting was focused on forgiveness.  There were so many thoughts I wanted to ponder.  One of the speakers referenced Pres. Faust's last conference address on forgiveness.  This is part of what he said:

Dr. Sidney Simon, a recognized authority on values realization, has provided an excellent definition of forgiveness as it applies to human relationships:

“Forgiveness is freeing up and putting to better use the energy once consumed by holding grudges, harboring resentments, and nursing unhealed wounds. It is rediscovering the strengths we always had and relocating our limitless capacity to understand and accept other people and ourselves.” ⁵

Most of us need time to work through pain and loss. We can find all manner of reasons for postponing forgiveness. One of these reasons is waiting for the wrongdoers to repent before we forgive them. Yet such a delay causes us to forfeit the peace and happiness that could be ours. The folly of rehashing long-past hurts does not bring happiness.

Some hold grudges for a lifetime, unaware that courageously forgiving those who have wronged us is wholesome and therapeutic.

Forgiveness comes more readily when we have faith in God and trust in His word. Such faith “enables people to withstand the worst of humanity. It also enables people to look beyond themselves. More importantly, it enables them to forgive.”    

All of us suffer some injuries from experiences that seem to have no rhyme or reason. We cannot understand or explain them. We may never know why some things happen in this life. The reason for some of our suffering is known only to the Lord. But because it happens, it must be endured. President Howard W. Hunter said that “God knows what we do not know and sees what we do not see.”

While I was traveling to and from Washington - I read the book "The Light Between Two Oceans."  It's been on my to-read list for awhile now.  I knew it was sad and I wasn't sure I wanted any gloom.  But the book was beautiful and hard and haunting.  Here is a beautiful quote that sums it up for me: 

“But how? How can you just get over these things?  You've had so much strife but you're always happy. How do you do it?'
'I choose to...I can leave myself to rot in the past, spend my time hating people for what happened, like my father did, or I can forgive and forget.'
'But it's not that easy.'
He smiled that Frank smile. 'Oh, but my treasure, it is so much less exhausting. You only have to forgive once. To resent, you have to do it all day, every day. You have to keep remembering all the bad things...I would have to make a list, a very, very long list and make sure I hated the people on it the right amount. That I did a proper job of hating, too: very Teutonic! No' - his voice became sober- 'we always have a choice. All of us.'" p.323”
― M.L. Stedman     The Light Between Oceans